I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
