I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
