i don't like sucking hair
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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