He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
