i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
