Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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