garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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