My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
