Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
