i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Randomize
