Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
