If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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