I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
