i may or may not be watching the land before time
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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