hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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