best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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