but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
