Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Duck Duck Cougar?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize