I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize