Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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