i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Randomize
