Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
