Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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