its not stalking. its research.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize