...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
bring money and cleavage
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
