Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
