no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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