His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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