Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Watching her eat just hurts me
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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