if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
