this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
