can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
