Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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