So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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