we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
