But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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