I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
