brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
