If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Randomize
