i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
