Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
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