I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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