OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
