we made out on top of his cat.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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