"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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