Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
