Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
