I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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