Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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