This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
