Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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